7. Does God love me too?
One day a mother was talking to her oldest son about the various problems that are troubling all the teenagers nowadays.
Sometime later, the discussion turned to God and the mother asked her son what his friends believe about Him.
-Some children, mum, believe simply that there is a superior power who governs the world. Others say that there is nothing, neither God nor soul. They believe that everything is material and ends with death, that is why they declare themselves as atheists. Others, on the other hand, believe that there is a God but He isn't concerned with them. Of course, there are those who believe in His existence and go to church.
-What do you believe, my child?
-To be honest mum, sometimes I believe and sometimes I have doubts. I won't hide from you that sometimes I don't want to think that there is a God.
-What is it that makes you think like that, my child?
-Mum, I am at an age, when I will make some mistakes like a child, some sins that, as we have been told in church, God doesn't want us to make. But I am weak and many times I cannot resist their power.
So, when I told this to someone who knows about religious things, he made me feel so bad and disappointed.
-Explain to me what he said, my son?
-He told me that I am a very sinful person, that's why I will be punished if I don't immediately change my life. He told me that I should be very careful not to make God angry with me and He punishes me. After that, I didn't want to have anything to do with God anymore, because I couldn't feel that I am such a wretched person. Basically, I have nothing against God, but I cannot continuously feel that God is watching me and looking for a reason to find something to condemn me for my human mistakes and punish me. What would you do, mum, if you felt like that? Could you continuously think of a God, who is ready to punish you, because you are human and make mistakes? I think this is the main reason why many children don't want to think about God.
-I am sorry, my son, that your soul was hurt by such thoughts and doubts about our good God. But, I would like, if you let me, to tell you what they say about our God, not anybody who just happens to concern themselves with God, but people who knew Him and loved Him, as our Saints did.
-Mum, who is able to live today like the Saints and follow the hard life that they made in order to be sanctified?
-The fact is, my child, that all of us make the same mistake about the Saints. We believe that they became sanctified only because of their great exercise. This is wrong. I could say that it's a great and tragic mistake.
-What else, then, could sanctify them, that I could not understand?
-Our Saints, my child were not sanctified by the exercise that they made, but by the divine love which was burning in their hearts for our Heavenly Father and the absolute trust which they had in Him. Exercise was a way to keep their bodies and souls humble. With this they were trying to eliminate their carnal weaknesses which polluted them and to release their souls from the bonds of their passions. Exercise was just the tool, which their divinely in love hearts were using to fly up to the high mountain peaks of holiness. Exercise was their own choice and not something that God asked from them, to prove how much they loved Him. I, for example, as your mother, have I ever asked you to make some great sacrifice to prove how much you love me?
-No, you never asked me anything like that. The only thing you asked me for, so you would be happy, was to be good and kind to all people, even to the bad ones and not to harm anybody.
-Was it very difficult, what I asked you for?
-No, on the contrary, I find it very right, good and true. That's why I always try to apply it in my life, so as my mum you will be happy.
-Well then, as I didn't ask you to do something difficult, to prove to me that you love me, but it was enough for me that you love me, respect me and don't do anything bad to offend me as your mummy, so our good God doesn’t ask you for anything difficult or impossible. The only thing He asks you for is to recognize Him as the Mother and Father of your soul and show this by living a courteous life. To live on this earth as His genuine child. Like His prince, since He is the King of all the world.
-And when I make some mistakes and sins, won't I be afraid that He will punish me?
-My son, each child's father and mother are not judges, ready to judge and condemn their child for his little human mistakes. Their role is to be tender and affectionate parents, who are anxious for their child and try to use every pedagogical way to help him in his struggle to become a valuable and useful person to society. Isn't that right?
-I agree with you, mum. I would be very glad to accept a God, Who won't be for me just a judge and punisher but a merciful Father and God.
-This is the real truth, my son, about our heavenly Father. He's the most merciful and compassionate sweet Father, full of affection, adoration, love and tenderness for all of us, Who is living with the unique joy of seeing us one day in His heavenly Kingdom. He cannot bear the thought that some of His children, who have been led astray by Satan's cunning and deceitfulness, would prefer instead of the joy of Paradise, the unspeakable grief and sorrow of hell. That's why like a real Mother, He sometimes uses every way, in order to wake us up from the spiritual lethargy into which Satan has thrown us with deceit. He may even scold us or impose some sadness to teach us a lesson, for some dangerous mistakes we commit, so that we stop the catastrophic descent we are taking. But all these things don't mean that He doesn't love us and the only thing He wants to do is punish and hurt us. Every time, I, your mum, was forced to impose some small punishment on you, did I do it because I hated you or, because of my motherly love for you, I was afraid that you would do or yourself suffer something bad? What was the motivation of my motherly heart? Love or hate for you?
-Of course, your great motherly love for me!
-My love, my son, is a small, very small example of His own infinite love for you. Every time that I, in every way, will show the great motherly love and adoration I have for you, it will be an opportunity for you to remember how infinitely our heavenly Father loves and adores you. My love for you, my sweet boy, is, like every mother for her baby, unique. It is something more than that which people call love. A pure, divine, heavenly love, which makes you as a mother love your baby so much, that you would sacrifice your own life if necessary! And our good God is not only an affectionate Father, but a sweet Mother ready to sacrifice Himself for His child's life. This is the only way for you to be able to understand the ultimate sacrifice, which our sweet Jesus made for us, by sacrificing Himself on the cross, to redeem us from the terrible bondages of Satan! Well, my son, are you afraid of that God? Are you keeping this sweet and Mother out of your life?
-I had never thought about it like that, mum, that's why now I feel sad for my doubts and the various silly thoughts I had about our good God. I couldn't imagine that He could love me, in the same way you, my mother, loves me. But now, I would like you to tell me, how I can correct all my mistakes but also what I could offer Him from now on?
-My son, the only thing He is asking from you, first of all, is to believe that He is the heavenly Father and Mother of your soul and from now on to call Him with the sweetest words in the world: "my sweet Father". Then, you should show Him with the courteousness of your behaviour and your whole life, that you are His son and His prince. And if you make a mistake, as you are human, don't be disappointed and run away from Him with fear or shame, but with trust and love enter into His arms, to ask Him humbly and without excuses to forgive you for your mistake. Then you will give Him the opportunity, not only to forgive you, but also to adorn you with the bright clothes of holiness.
-Mum, what, in other words, is holiness?
-My child, holiness is the great secret divine love that someone has inside his mind, his heart and his soul for his heavenly Father and God. When God sees this love, He floods His child's soul with every gift of the Holy Spirit. Our Saints were not anything other than simple and humble souls, who with divine love in their hearts, left all their existence with absolute love, trust and obedience into the divine hands of their beloved King God! I wish that you, my beloved child, would be like them and I will be proud of you as His own earthly angel!-Mum, from today on, I promise you that I will struggle with all my heart to love and trust our heavenly Father and God, like you do!